“Thanks for the roller skates”, she said as she climbed on the train back to school. I smiled to myself, knowing that I had given her something valuable.

I tried to remember back to my 16th birthday. My life wasn’t particularly happy at that time. Birthdays always came with some vague hope of something special happening, some unexpected gift that would make everything all right. They were always followed by a sense of disappointment. When I was 16, the tensions around the house had only gotten worse. My parents had separated. My older brothers had set off in hopes of finding themselves, and I was home, trying to care for my mother and spending too much time arguing with my sister.

Mairead, my eldest daughter was off at school on her 16th birthday. She came home for vacation while I was on the road and I ended up only getting a little time to spend with her. She has always been outwardly appreciative of the gifts she received and I’m sure she said thanks for various tangible objects she had received, but this was different.

As we got ready to head off to the train station, she fought with her sister. Her sister wanted more attention than Mairead was able to give. How well I knew that feeling. Sometimes it seems like that sums up my whole life. She was sitting on the couch next to me and I talked about some of the things that I had gone through during my divorce.