Meaning: Eat, Pray, Love, Tom Foley, and #swct

Between the heat, technology problems, a bunch of funerals, planning Social Web Week, and a couple of mailing lists that have been pretty noisy recently, I feel like I’m falling way behind. I haven’t been reading emails and replying as quickly as I would like. I haven’t been reading as many other websites as I would like. I haven’t been spending as much time writing as I would like. I have spent a bit more time reading, and reflecting, and even relaxing in the pool, all of which is good. I’ve also spent a bit of time worrying about getting enough billable hours.

All of this brings me to some interesting questions. What is the proper work-life balance? How does a recession affect the proper balance? If you’re self-employed and working online, what are appropriate work hours? What if your work involves writing and socializing online? From a writing perspective, what is the right balance between writing, reflecting, reading (both online and off), and experiencing? Perhaps even more interestingly, how do we make these determinations?

I often go back to an old labor union chant, “Our life is more than our work, and our work is more than our job.” They overlap. They influence one another, but too often people confuse the three different ideas.

One idea that is always helpful within a group is to examine the group’s primary task. On one mailing list, there have been a lot of emails that have felt off-topic. People have taken time away from the group, and in extreme cases left the group because they were not getting what they wanted from the group. One friend suggested that there are two useful questions that need to be posed, “What do you think your purpose was in making that contribution?” and “What was the result that it produced?”

Sometimes, we may make contributions to groups we are part of, not out of our desire to help the group with its primary task, but out of some personal needs. We may even try to convince ourselves that we are really seeking the help the group. Sometimes, we might even be on task, but ineffective. That is where the second question comes in.

Of course, this second question can be more problematic. We cannot always clearly attribute certain results to the actions we have taken. Sometimes we may attribute results to our actions when they were really caused by something else, or we may convince ourselves that the certain results were due to our actions when they were really due to something else.

Underlying all of this is how we understand the purpose to our lives. It is easy to look at this in terms of Abraham Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. At the most basic level, there are the physical needs; food, water, shelter, etc. Higher up the hierarchy there needs of feeling safe, loved, having self esteem and reaching some sort of self-actualization. Yet even in this, there are questions about how fine our food needs to be or how comfortable our shelter needs to be. Ascetic mystics who seem focused on self-actualization, eating the simplest fare and living in the sparsest conditions come to mind.

Viktor Frankl’s book “Man’s Search for Meaning” provides another view to explore. How was it that people could keep on in concentration camps? Where did people get ability to help others in these difficult situations while at the same time, others tried to take advantage of those around them?

As I relaxed at the town pool the other day, a woman talked about reading the book “Eat, Pray, Love” and I thought about how this book relates to our search for balance. Is there something going on in our world right now that is leading more of us to renew a search for balance?

How did September 11th affect Americans’ view of the meaning of their lives? How was this affected by the politics of the last decade and how did the politics of the last decade shape our views of the meaning of our lives? What impact has the oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico had on the way we understand our lives?

Recently, I reconnected with a bunch of old friends from Grace Church in New York City from the 1980s. In that circle and others, I used to ponder parts of the Westminster Shorter Catechism. “What is the chief end of Man?” “Man’s chief end is to glorify God and enjoy him forever.” As I listened to the discussion of “Eat, Pray, Love”, it sounded like the author was touching this idea of enjoying God forever in a broader tradition than that of the Westminster Shorter Catechism.

“What is the chief end of Man?” Perhaps this is a question that we need to be asking our political leaders. Dan Malloy and Ned Lamont are fighting for our votes as they seek to become the Democratic nominees for Governor in the State of Connecticut. They have sniped at one another. They have offered ideas about how they would address the problems our state faces. Underneath all of this is the question of what is their chief end?

This is perhaps even more pointed when we look at the GOP Gubernatorial Candidate Tom Foley seeking to prevent his opponent from receiving public financing. Does this reflect some broader effort to glorify God and enjoy God forever? Is it part of some effort to make help others find meaning in their lives? I suspect Foley supporters might try to spin it that way. It is about making sure that the letter of the law is followed, whether or not it matches the spirit of the law. It is about trying to prevent the government from distributing money to help voters learn about the candidates, because of a belief that money can be better spent by individuals, especially those who can spend millions of their own money to try and influence political discourse in our state and country.

Meanwhile, I, and others, need to attend to the lower levels of Maslow’s hierarchy. I need to find more billable hours to earn bread for my table. Others need to get more people visiting their businesses. Social Web Week seems to be a good way to focus on this.

On Saturday, I went to the Tweetcrawl at Miya’s Sushi in New Haven. Miya’s sushi focuses on great food that is sustainable. It has a feeling of meeting people at different levels in Maslow’s hierarchy. Social media can be a tool to help us find friendship and self-esteem and connect with others also seeking self-actualization. It can also be a tool to help people take advantage of one another, and we all need to make our choices about how we use social media.

Now, I’ve had my brief time of reflection and writing. “What do I think my purpose was in making this contribution?” Some of it is simply fulfilling a need to reflect and write. It is who I am. Some of it, perhaps, is about some need to try and get others to stop and reflect; reflect about how their lives may or may not be glorifying God, enjoying God, or helping others do so. I doubt it is something that would result in a new billable contract, but I wouldn’t mind that either.

As to “What was the result that it produced?” we will have to wait and see. What do you think?