I am trying, with the help of friends, to discern what sort of vocation God is calling me to. It may seem like a strange task for a fifty-six year old man with a successful career. It seems strange to me.

Why now? I am hoping that exploring this question will help me get to the question of what God is calling me to. I am exploring this publicly, online, because part of ‘now’ is the world of the Internet, a world I spend a lot of time in as a social media manager. Part of ‘now’ is the waning participation in church, especially by Millennials. Part of ‘now’ is struggles within the body of Christ, here in the United States, as well as around the world, about what the sacrament of Marriage means and if it is right to offer, or withhold that sacrament from same-sex couples. Of course, all of these are interconnected.

Two important events happened this week related to all of this. We had the first meeting of my discernment committee, which I’ve been writing about in other blog posts and a group of bishops in England voted to not allow members of The Episcopal Church to serve on certain committees. A question that both of these events raise is, what sort of relationship should I have with the church hierarchy? With my bishop? With the Presiding Bishop? With the Anglican Communion as a whole?

Before I go much further, I should provide context for those not acquainted with what happened in Canterbury, or who have gotten impartial and probably misleading views of what happened from various media outlets.

To start with, it is best to read the full communique of #Primates2016. It is worth noting that these are ‘recommendations’ supported by a majority of the bishops attending.

The Episcopal Church no longer represent us on ecumenical and interfaith bodies, should not be appointed or elected to an internal standing committee and that while participating in the internal bodies of the Anglican Communion, they will not take part in decision making on any issues pertaining to doctrine or polity.

This recommendation, ostensibly is because of The Episcopal Church’s resolution to permit same-sex marriage. Yet I have to wonder if General Convention Resolution A051, Support LGBT African Advocacy, may have been a larger issue. House of Deputies President Gay Clark Jennings mentions this resolution in her letter on the primates meeting.

Some people complaining about the actions of The Episcopal Church have spoken about it in the language of colonialism. Changing policies on how gay people are treated in the United States seems very far from colonialism, but fighting for human rights in other countries could seem like colonialism to those opposed to such human rights.

In the same letter, Jennings writes

The practical consequences of the primates’ action will be that, for three years, Episcopalians will not be invited to serve on certain committees, or will be excluded from voting while they are there. However, the primates do not have authority over the Anglican Consultative Council, the worldwide body of bishops, clergy and lay people that facilitates the cooperative work of the churches of the Anglican Communion. I serve as a representative to that body…and I am planning to travel to Zambia for our scheduled meeting in April and to participate fully.

A website of conservative Anglicans has described this as “Episcopal Church leader announces she will defy primates ban”.

The best explanation of what the communique really means that I’ve seen so far is from The Rev. Andrew McGowan, Dean of Berkeley Divinity School, No, the Episcopal Church has not been suspended from the Anglican Communion.

In his post, Rev. McGowan asks, “What is the Anglican Communion?” It is a question I struggle with as I explore a possible ordained ministry within the Anglican Communion, as I think about ecumenical and inter-faith issues, having invited people from other faith traditions to serve on my discernment committee.

McGowan points to a post by The Rev. Jesse Zink, On beyond Primates. Rev. Zink talks about a man he met at a small Anglican church in Nigeria, very different from the stereotypical Nigerian Anglican church. Towards the end of the post, Zink says,

Yet no matter who anathematizes whom or what vitriol surges forth, I will continue to believe in the reality of the Anglican Communion because of that man in that village in rural Nigeria. He and I share a bond based not on agreement on contentious issues or a common cultural background but on a common baptism and a shared willingness to live a life shaped by the good news of Jesus Christ.

The church I am exploring ordination in is the church of this man in Nigeria, of Rev Zink, and so many others seeking to “live a life shaped by the good news of Jesus Christ”.

Since the communique from Canterbury, there have been all kinds of reactions online. One that particularly struck me was from St. Laurence Cowley, Friendship bears for ECUSA. It is a wonderful gesture showing support those who feel most hurt by the request of the Primates.

One friend posted about going to a wonderful interfaith worship service, and not feeling all that upset about this whole communique from Canterbury because she has plenty of people to pray with. She acknowledge that this might not be perfect Anglican party line thinking, I suggested that it seems to fit very well with what the Episcopal Church Presiding Bishop’s response to Primates’ statement.

We are the Episcopal Church, and we are part of the Jesus Movement, and that Movement goes on, and our work goes on. And the truth is, it may be part of our vocation to help the Communion and to help many others to grow in a direction where we can realize and live the love that God has for all of us, and we can one day be a Church and a Communion where all of God’s children are fully welcomed, where this is truly a house of prayer for all people.

I started off my blog post using the words discernment and vocation. I did this deliberately. Normally, I try to shun church speak, to try and make my posts more accessible, but I wanted to use those to words because they are words my ears are especially attuned to right now. Bishop Curry spoke about our vocation, and as such, it is part of my vocation. A vocation shared at a small Anglican church in Nigeria, at an interfaith worship service, and in comments online.

A lot of people are wringing their hands right now about the communique from Canterbury. People are praying for priests that get to preach tomorrow on Jesus’ first miracle, changing water into wine at a wedding in Cana of Galilee.

My thought for those looking for words, Jesus’ first miracle turned something that could have been hurtful, a big disappointment, into an even greater cause for celebration. I am praying that God will use the communique out of Canterbury to reinvigorate all who seek that day when we can “be a Church and a Communion where all of God’s children are fully welcomed”. I am praying that as we seek to understand Anglican Vocation, we may all see bringing this about as part of our vocations.

I’m finding others sharing similar thoughts. The Vicar of St. Martin in the Fields wrote,

The ray of hope from the experience of those who have come out is this. Those same people whose ostracism hurt them so much, in many cases later came to say: “But you’re my brother, my sister, my child – I cannot reject you.” Likewise worldwide Anglicans have been rediscovering, “Our unity is integral to our identity: we don’t know who we are without each other.”