AGPA

Posts related to the American Group Psychotherapy Association

Upcoming Events

There is an old saying that time is God’s way of making sure that everything doesn’t happen at once. However, as the spouse of a person who has worked as a scheduler for politicians, I can tell you that it doesn’t always work that well, especially as we approach an election. It is with this in mind that I write my latest update of upcoming events. This time, I’ll probably just sort them chronologically, especially since there are so many conflicts

October 7th

Wednesday is International Walk To School Day. I received a media advisory that Mayor DeStefano, Superintendent Mayo and others will kick off this day at the Yale Bowl with students from Edgewood school who will then walk to Edgewood school. I am trying to organize a walk with my daughter to her school, perhaps with some of her classmates.

At 7 in the evening, there will be a Meet the [potential] Gubernatorial Candidates Evening sponsored by the Shoreline League of Democratic Women. It will take place at the Old Saybrook Democratic Headquarters on 105 Elm Street. Secretary of State Bysiewicz, Stamford Mayor Malloy, State Senator Lebeau and former speaker of the house Amann are expected to attend. It is not sure if Ridgefield First Selectman Rudy Marconi, who has just set up an exploratory committee will also attend.

Also at 7 in the evening there will be a Mayoral Debate in New Britain at Tercyak Lecture Hall in the high school. I would love to go up and show my support for Tim O’Brian, but I doubt I will make it.

In addition, the New Haven Democracy for America group will be meeting at Wall Street Pizza at 90 Wall Street in New Haven. Jen Just will talk about what is going on with Organizing for America here in Connecticut and State Sen. Ed Meyer will talk about the State Budget process.

Also starting on Wedneday is The Association of Internet Researchers 10th annual meeting in Milwaukee and Digital Media West.

October 9th

On October 9th, there will be a fundraiser for United Church on the Green, in New Haven. It will take place from 6 to 8:30 in the Church Parish house. The host committee is a list of some of the most influential political and religious figures in the state.

Upcoming Events

I have now updated the Upcoming Events section of my blog. Initially, I would write a blog post about once a year talking about the major upcoming events of the year, and key conferences that I hoped to attend. I haven’t done that in a while, and instead have been writing more short term orient posts about upcoming events.

With that, I’ve changed my UpcomingEvents link to include all articles about upcoming events and I hope to add to this list on a much more frequent basis.

With that, let me get to some upcoming events.

Cable Related

The Sound View Community Media Board will be having the next quarterly meeting Monday at 8:30 at Sound View headquarters. The Woodbridge Government Access Television Commission will have their monthly meeting Monday evening at 6 PM at the Woodbridge Town Hall and the Milford Government Access Television committee will meet Tuesday at 7 PM at the Platt Tech media library.

On Saturday, November 7th the Northeast Region of the Alliance for Community Media (ACM-NE) will hold a Video Festival and Workshops at the West Hartford Town Hall. Currently the planned tracks for the workshop are on Advanced Production Skills and Public Policy, Grassroots Organizing and Lobbying.

Woodbridge Events

Jonathan Gorham of the Woodbridge Clean Energy Initiative (WCEI) will present the CT Energy Efficiency Fund’s Home Energy Solutions energy audit and retrofit program. Woodbridge residents can get a $25 rebate (off a regular $75 co-pay) to have certified, trained energy professionals identify and repair leaks in your home. These contractors also test air ducts, replace incandescent light bulbs, check insulation and examine appliances. This could save at least $350 in the first year. Gorham will also discuss the town’s commitment to International Climate Action Day, October 24, 2009. (I hope to write more about this soon).

The Massaro Community Farm, in collaboration with the Woodbridge Conservation Commission, will hold its 1st Annual Massaro Farm Family Fun Day on Saturday October 24th from 1 to 4:30pm

Pet Related

As noted in my previous Upcoming Events post, the Amity Animal Rescue Fund will have their annual Goods and Services Auction September 24th from 6 to 9:30 PM at the Country Club of Woodbridge.

Pumpkins & Pooches will take place Oct. 4 from 9-4 on the Colchester Green.

The Connecticut Underhound Railroad is currently planning their first adoption day to be held at the Doggie Castle in Cromwell. Current plans are for the event to take place Oct. 10 from 10 to 2.

Politics

Rep. Rosa DeLauro will hold a Seniors Health Care Forum On Monday September 21st at 10:30 AM at the Bridgehouse Auditorium, Masonicare at Ashlar Village Cheshire Road in Wallingford, CT.

The CT Citizens Action Group (CCAG), will have a fundraiser next Saturday Sept 26 - 4-6pm. It is almost across the street from us at 826 Fountain St. Woodbridge, CT 06525

Secretary of the State Susan Bysiewicz will conduct a Public Service Awards ceremony honoring a more than 300 World War II veterans from West Hartford taking place at Conard High School on Saturday September 26, 2009 9:00 a.m.

The kick off rally for Abolition Day sponsored by the Connecticut Network to Abolish the Death Penalty will take place Sunday, October 4th at the Capitol Building in Hartford, starting at 2 PM. Then, on the 5th, there will be an event at the Faith Missionary Tabernacle in Stamford talking about “Faith and Law: Perspectives on Repealing the Death Penalty”

The Democratic State Central Committee’s will hold its 6th Annual Ella Grasso Women’s Leadership Awards breakfast on Friday, October 16 from 8:00 a.m. until 9:30 a.m.

Conferences

The New York Games Conference will take place September 30th at the Museum of Jewish Heritage in New York City. I attended the conference last year and will see if I can make it this year.

The Association of Internet Researchers will hold their 10th annual meeting in Milwaukee starting on October 7th. I’ve attended a few AoIR conferences, but won’t be able to make it to this one.

Digital Media West also starts on October 7th. I go to their conferences in New York when I can, but not to the conferences on the West Coast.

Ad:tech New York will take place November 4-6 at the Javits Convention Center. I’ve been to ad:tech other years and need to decide if I want to try and make it this year.

However, at the same time is the National Association of Dance Therapy annual conference in White Plains. Two years ago, I went to the American Group Therapy Association annual conference in Washington, which was a great conference. I’m seriously consider both the NADT annual conference, and if I can work things out, traveling to San Diego for the AGPA conference next February.

Other Stuff

Michael Dooling will discuss and sign his book, Milford Lost and Found at Collected Stories Bookstore, 12 Daniel Street, Milford, Ct on October 1 from 6:30 to 8:00 pm.

On October 9th, there will be a fundraiser for United Church on the Green, in New Haven. It will take place from 6 to 8:30 in the Church Parish house. The host committee is a list of some of the most influential political and religious figures in the state.

On October 10th, the Friends of East Rock Park will have their second annual Chili Cook-Off as part of their Oktoberfest II. It will take place at College Woods in East Rock Park starting at 4 PM.

I still have many emails flagged for follow-up in my inbox and many more that I haven’t even gotten a chance to review, so there are probably more conferences and other upcoming events that should go on this list. Check back again later.

The Great Dance

Rabbit, Rabbit, Rabbit. I start the first blog post of every month with the phrase “Rabbit, Rabbit, Rabbit” harkening back to a hope of childhood that saying those words first thing in the morning of the first day of the month would some how bring luck for the month. The beginning of a new month can be like the beginning of a new year, in whatever calendar, or a new administration, a chance to hope again.

Yet hope can be a fleeting thing. I’ve been a bit out of sorts over the past week. My wife, Kim, has commented on it and I’ve been wondering what it has all been about. Have the incessant winter storms been finally worn me down? Am I struggling from season affective disorders? Is it a “Blue Monday” sort of effect? Are there other factors, new twist in our difficult financial situation? Could it be related to health, the endless coughs, headaches and other symptoms of the winter cold season? Could it be my continued struggle to find the right combination of medications to keep my blood pressure and cholesterol under control? Might it be concerns about residual affects of Kim’s battle with Lyme disease?

All of these seam reasonable explanations. However, most of these have been ongoing struggles. Was there something particular about last week? As I think about what is going on in the nation and the world, I see reasons for hope. Yes, President Obama has a rough road ahead of him as he tries to deal with the issues our country faces. Yes, wars continue overseas. Yes, the end of economic woes does not appear to be around the corner, but all in all, things in the world seem like they are starting to head in a better direction.

I remember years ago when Star Wars came out. I seem to recall a scene where the Death Star destroys a planet, and Obi-Wan feels and comments upon this disturbance in the force. Yeah, it’s science fiction, but I’ve often felt that we can sense something wrong, a long ways away. I’ve often had these feelings right before getting a phone call from my mother about some death or serious illness in the family. Perhaps, there was a disturbance in the force this past week that has somehow affected me.

I’ve often written about a mailing list of Group Psychotherapists that I’m on. Several years ago, I had the opportunity to meet one of the members face to face. Danielle Fraenkel is a dance/movement therapist from Rochester, NY. She was in New York City to care for her aging mother so my wife and I trekked into the city to have dinner with her.

It was a wonderful dinner. At the time, my eldest daughter, Mairead, was studying the holocaust, and Dani’s mother had lots of stories that would have helped make Mairead’s studies much more real and immediate. Unfortunately, Dani’s mother was too weak to speak with Mairead. However, Dani did give us a copy of a book, Samuel Mendelsson: A Man Who Must Not Be Forgotten. It was written by H. Alexander Fraenkel, who, if I remember properly was Dani’s father.

In the introduction, Mr. Fraenkel writes,

It may be that some of the many are still alive and will remember; it may be that others will learn about this Jewish gentleman, and – it may be wishful thinking – that someone may begin to think, and no more to hate.

Over the years, I’ve met others from the mailing list, and last year I went to the American Group Psychotherapy Association (AGPA) annual conference in Washington DC. There, I had the chance to have dinner with Carol Lark.

Carol is an art therapist in St. Louis. I had been talking about the possible uses of Second Life as a therapeutic environment on the mailing list. Carol had joined Second Life and was looking around. Over a wonderful dinner we talked about many things, including the potential for Second Life.

What had gotten me interested in the therapeutic potential of Second Life was a chance encounter I had had sometime earlier in Second Life.

I had been invited to a pajama party. May people in Second Life spend a lot of money on clothes there and had very nice pajamas. I had nothing notable. However, I did have the shape of a cat that I had received when I covered an art opening in Second Life.

So, I changed shape into a cat and ran around the pajama party, dragging a pillow behind me and tripping up even the most agile avatars. Everyone cursed that damn cat, but it seemed as if that was all part of the fun for everyone, so I only redoubled my efforts.

Afterwards, a woman named Gentle Heron, who appeared to be an agile and attractive twenty-something approached me and wanted to make sure that my feelings had not been hurt by all the curses and that it was, for me, as much part of the game, as it was for her and others.

I reassured her that I had a good time and enjoyed the role I was in. She then proceeded to thank me. You see, she is the head of the Heron Society, a group of people in Second Life dedicated to helping others with disabilities. People in the Heron society were going through the difficult task of processing grief over the suicide of a friend, and Gentle really needed a chance to just relax and run around like everyone else.

Gentle and I became good friends and I later learned more about her. In real life, she has advanced multiple sclerosis. She gets around with the use of crutches or a wheelchair and doesn’t get out that much. Second Life is a great tool to connect with others for her and through her, I have learned a lot about people with various disabilities. So, when Carol entered Second Life I made sure the two of them connected.

At the same AGPA annual conference, I attended one of Dani’s workshops. It is hard to find words for what a powerful experience it was, and I encourage everyone to try to get to one of her workshops if you can. With my thoughts about the disabled community in the forefront of my mind, I was very pleased to hear Dani talk about how she used dance and movement therapy for people of all levels of ability and dreamed of ways of bringing her expertise, through Second Life, to those who are very limited in their physical abilities, except when they are in Second Life.

Then, yesterday, it became all so much more complicated, as life is wont to do. The ripple in the force arrived. I received an email that Carol has acute leukemia. Carol, the ever loving kind and artistic therapist, has written a little bit about this part of her journey at CareBridge. CareBridge is a wonderful “nonprofit web service that connects family and friends during a critical illness, treatment or recovery.”

The unit she is in “has a grant to offer complementary/holistic medicine procedures to the patients on demand for free.” Carol describes “a guided imagery session” she sees “a distant horizon of women dancing with bare feet, all kinds of women, young and old form all over the world.”

Through the magic of Second Life, the physically disabled can dance, men can become cats or even women dancing with bare feet. We can join in the guided imagery and dance a dance of healing for Carol. Whatever your tradition or beliefs, please send prayers, kind thoughts, positive energy, or whatever you can in Carol’s direction.

With all of this in mind, I had an interesting discussion with my seven-year-old daughter Fiona. We were sitting in the car while Kim was trying to get some prescriptions filled. We were listening to the band Red Molly. It is a trio that we’ve often heard at Falcon Ridge Folk Festival and it is one of Fiona’s favorite bands.

Fiona really likes their upbeat tunes, like their rendition of “Keep Your Lamp Trimmed and Burning.” When the slower, more contemplative songs come on, she wants me to skip over them.

Yet I like some of their slower more contemplative songs, so we listened to “May I Suggest” which I suggested to Fiona was a very important song. She wanted to know why I thought it was so important, so we listened to the lyrics and talked about them a little bit, in terms of Carol’s battle.

May I suggest, may I suggest to you, may I suggest this is the best part of your life.
May I suggest, this time is blest for you
This time is blest in shining almost blinding bright.

Now amidst all the fear, pain and confusion that I imagine Carol must be facing right now, I suggested that this moment, now, just might be the best part of her life. It is a moment where her she will use all her skills to battle a horrible disease. It is a time that the words she gets a chance to write are an important gift to anyone that reads them.

More importantly, for each one of us, this is, or at least can be, the best part of our lives. This moment. Now. Simply by being in the moment and seeing the beauty around us, this can be the best part of our lives.

'Tis the gift to be simple, 'tis the gift to be free,
'Tis the gift to come down where you ought to be,
And when we find ourselves in the place just right,
'Twill be in the valley of love and delight.
When true simplicity is gain'd,
To bow and to bend we shan't be asham'd,
To turn, turn will be our delight,
Till by turning, turning we come round right.

So, I worry about finances, health and just getting by from day to day. Yet I also join in the Great Dance, with Carol, and Gentle, and Dani, and Alexander and Samuel and anyone else who will join in. I hold on to the hope of a new month, a new year, a new administration, or simply a new day and a new moment, and I say “Rabbit, Rabbit, Rabbit”.

The Foreclosure

After writing my last post, I showered and got in the car to drive down to Stamford for the foreclosure. As I drove down, I took mental notes for my story about the foreclosure. I’ll save those notes for a short story if I actually get around to writing it. Suffice it to say, that like my experiences at the AGPA conference, I approached this as a participant-observer, and it served me well.

When I got to Stamford, there were already people exploring the property. Merrie Hawley and her husband were there. Merrie was the attorney conducting the sale.

“It wasn’t a typical foreclosure, but how many of them really are?”

She gave me a copy of the article in the Stamford Advocate about the house sale:

Treasure to be auctioned tomorrow. It is a great article which captures a little bit about what makes Orient Lodge so special.

The interior of the bungalow displays varnished logs, and the walls were chinked with mud and horsehair, said Judy Brewton of Stamford, who is preparing a film history of Long Ridge Village.

I smiled. The article had Judy’s fingerprints all over it. Judy, like other members of the Historical Society love Orient Lodge, perhaps as much as I do. She has fought tirelessly to make sure that the house will be preserved. This article, could, perhaps, contribute to finding the next caretaker for Orient Lodge.

I spent a lot of time talking with various people about the house; its history, my own history, and how we’ve gotten to where things are. In many ways, while it was horribly sad, it also felt like a special party. There were many people there that loved the house and were committed to trying to find someone who would take it on, the way I had hoped to, fifteen years ago. Members of different Historical Societies from around the area were there. Some had gone sleepless, the night before, as had I, in hopes that someone would come to preserve the house.

Judy and some of her friends worked the crowd, passing out an eight by eleven piece of paper.

To All Bidders:

An article in yesterday’s Advocate stated that subdivsion of the Orient Lodge property is possible, but did not mention that because the house sits in the middle of the property, subdivision would not be possible without destruction of the house.

Please be advised that demolishing this house in order to subdivide the property may be against Connecticut Law.

Orient Lodge is an officially designated CT State Historic Property, as well as being situated within the Long Ridge Village Historic District, as listed on the National Register of Historic Places.

Respectfully,

The Long Ridge Historic District Commission:

Judy Brewton
Michael Carroll
Phyllis Laline
Marshall Millsap
Cynthia Russell

I would guess that there were around forty people that showed up. Some were neighbors and old friends who were circumspect. They knew me. They knew how hard it is on me to be losing Orient Lodge. Some seemed afraid to talk to me, not sure how I would react. Yet as I spoke with many friends and people, others could see that I was okay, and loosened up.



The Foreclosure, originally uploaded by Aldon.

Merrie read all the legalize and announced that the auction would begin. Only six or so people had brought bank checks and could bid. She announced the initial bid by the bank, $680,948.14, approximately half the amount it had been appraised for when we got the mortgage, and well under even the appraised value as listed by the court.

She looked around the room. Would anyone bid? Time passed. She asked for bids. No one moved. A few people joked nervously. Finally, she announced, going once, going twice, bidding is closed. There was no bid, other than the banks bid.

Most of us were shocked. I went up to Merrie to listen in on the discussions. Everyone was asking what happens next. As I understand it, assuming the court approves the sale, it becomes the banks property in thirty days. I have until then to try and come up with some other solution. Others can get in touch with the bank and try to negotiate directly with them. This is the most likely course of action for most people.

I spoke with many people afterwards. Why didn’t anyone bid? Had the Historical Society people scared off the developers? Did everyone else feel they didn’t need to bid, since it looked like developers wouldn’t seek to tear down the property? Did people avoid bidding because of the crowd, out of fear that a bidding war might erupt? It is hard to say.

As I spoke with one couple, the discussion shifted to the idea of the caretaker. In many ways, I was the caretaker of Orient Lodge for fifteen years. It is now someone else’s turn. During the last years, I couldn’t do as much as I would have liked. Someone remarked that the previous two owners had lived there until they died. I was the first person to leave the house alive in over half a century.

So, what happens now? Monday, people will contact the bank. We will see what happens next. My biggest concern has been that developers would tear down the building. My second biggest concern is that somehow, someone would come along and restore the house and I would lose my connection with it. Yet I spoke with many people who hope to restore the house, and I hope that someone will restore the house and I will be able to stay in touch with the new owners and help them achieve a vision of the house that I never managed to.

As I drove down to Stamford, I wondered, if I write a story about the foreclosure, how would it turn out. Somehow, the stalemate of no bids, while it does nothing to help my current financial situation, may be the best for the rest story and for the story that I may write.

At least, it leaves the story open for the next chapter.

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Open Letter to AGPA concerning interfacing with the media

Below is an open letter that I sent to the American Group Psychotherapy Association in response to my experiences as a blogger at their annual meeting. It has generated some interesting discussions and I look forward to the next steps.

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