Personal
Rocky, Barley, Prada and The Fosters
Submitted by Aldon Hynes on Sat, 09/04/2010 - 09:40Oh very young
What will you leave us this time
You're only dancing on this earth for a short while
...
And though you want to last forever
You know you never will
And the goodbye makes the journey harder still
Four and a half years ago, we said good bye to my yellow lab. He had lived a wonderful long life, and we were very sad to see him go. Earlier this summer, we said good bye to Barley. Barley had been Kim's chocolate lab for longer than I knew Kim and for several years longer than Fiona had been our daughter. It was a summer of grieving.
Fiona, who is very interested in dog rescuing wanted to adopt a new dog as soon as possible, but Kim wanted to wait a little while, to get past a little bit of her grief, as well as to not have a dog to worry about during our summer travels.
Well, it is Labor Day weekend. Fiona is back and school and we are settled into the fall schedule. It is a good time to start looking for a new dog. Should we get another lab? Larger dogs often have shorter lives than smaller dogs, and it is so hard to say goodbye. Labs are great dogs, and it would be wonderful to get a new lab. Kim's father and brother have dog allergies. They both have Golden Doodles. Getting some sort of poodle mix might be a good solution. It would be great to get a pit bull. Despite the bad press they get, they are some of the sweetest dogs I've ever met when they are properly raised. Unfortunately, we currently rent a house and raising a pit bull isn't an option right now.
Yet there is another option that I have been thinking a lot about, fostering a dog. Typically, when a dog gets rescued, she gets taken to a shelter. While this sure beats being out on the street or being put to sleep, shelters can be hard on dogs. They really need companions to care for them. So, various rescues find people to foster dogs for them. The dog lives with a family and is lovingly cared for. These dogs end up well socialized, nicely groomed, and are the sort of dogs that have a much greater chance of finding a forever home.
The problem with fostering, especially for people like Kim and Fiona, is that fosterers often fall in love with the dogs they are fostering. Some fosterers end up having several dogs that they have problems parting with. As one rescuer said, there is a fine line between fostering several dogs and hoarding. It has been so hard to say good bye to Rocky and Barley that the idea of fostering seemed too difficult to my wife.
Yet recently, I read that the Sadie Mae Foundation has lost the use of its kennel in Bolton. While they try to find new space, they need to find fosterers. I've contacted the Sadie Mae Foundation and offered my services.
Then, I saw a message on Facebook about Prada, Prada is an absolutely gorgeous Chocolate Labrador Retriever Weimaraner mix. She needed a short term foster in Connecticut, so I asked Kim and we volunteered. Kim was quite excited and mentioned it to Fiona as well as to her parents. Everyone was quite excited and fell in love with Prada just from the description and photo. Things were set up for us to pick up Prada on Saturday morning and keep her until she gets adopted.
Then, late last night, I got a message that Prada had been adopted and would be picked up Saturday morning. Our fostering services were not needed for Prada. Rocky and Barley were both in our lives for fourteen years and it was hard to say good bye to them. Prada was only in our thoughts for fourteen hours and it was hard to say good bye to her as well.
This morning, Fiona and Kim have been looking at the various dogs available for adoption at Big Fluffy Dogs. They have immediately fallen in love with half a dozen of the dogs. Any of them would be great additions to our family.
However, I am still hoping we will foster dogs. We can help more dogs that way. We can experience a wider variety of dogs in our house. Yes, it will be hard saying good bye more often, but I believe it is well worth it. In addition, fosterers who fail at fostering and want to keep a dog often get first dibs with the rescues they are fostering dogs for.
So, as of this morning, it is unclear if we will foster or adopt. It is unclear the breed or age of dog that will join our family, or when it will happen. What is clear is that we will find some dog that needs rescuing that will fit with our family as soon as possible.
If you are considering adding a dog to your family, you should really consider fostering. I could be a wonderful experience.
#ff @khynes2000 @shesosocial @ctnewsjunkie
Submitted by Aldon Hynes on Fri, 09/03/2010 - 15:40It's my birthday! I went out to lunch with my boss and am having dinner with family and friends. Well, sort of. You see, about ten years ago, I participated in a strange mystical ceremony where I became 'one flesh' with the person I loved.
Today, it is Kim's birthday. Through the mystical ceremony, I am one flesh with her, so to that extent, it is also my birthday. I was with Kim, as part of being one flesh, as she had dinner with her boss. We will be one flesh as she eats dinner with our family and friends this evening.
Whenever she is joyful, it is no longer just she who is joyful, it is both of us. The same applies to sadness and sickness. Today, we also mourn the death of Kim's mother, who left this world eleven years ago today, when Kim and I were having dinner with Kim's father, brother and sister-in-law.
Over the past couple of years, I've had a horrible time fighting lyme disease. While a doctor might test my blood and find no traces of lyme disease in me, being of one flesh with Kim, I have lyme disease. We have experienced the disease in different ways, just as the nose and the stomach may experience different aspects of the flu, but we have fought this together.
In a similar fashion, a couple years ago, Kim and I developed a shellfish allergy. We first noticed it when I prepared shrimp for her for mother's day. It is disappointing that I cannot eat shrimp or lobster any more. Yet in fact, really, I can. It is just that my other digestive system, Kim's, needs to eat the lobster, and not I.
Being Friday, I am putting this up as a Follow Friday post. If you follow me on Twitter, you should follow @khynes2000 as well.
Not only is today Kim's (and by extension, my) birthday. It also sees the celebration of anniversaries of some friends. @ctnewsjunkie and her husband celebrated their third wedding anniversary this week. Tomorrow, @SheSoSocial and her husband are celebrating their fifth wedding anniversary.
I hope their relationships may flourish the way Kim and mine has.
A final thought: I had a philosophy professor that commented, "It isn't love that keeps marriage together, it is marriage that keeps love together." Kim and I have had some pretty rough times over the past decade. I'm sure we will have plenty more. If we were relying on the first flush of love to keep our marriage together, things probably would have been more difficult when we went through hard times. Yet it is birthdays and anniversaries, it is marriage, that is our opportunities to be reminded of and rekindle those early days of mad love.
Happy Birthday, Kim.
Grumpy
Submitted by Aldon Hynes on Tue, 08/31/2010 - 15:22Today, I sat down to write a blog post about running IPv6 on my Nokia N900. As I worked on it, I ran into a problem with my phone and I am now getting "No connection available". I spent a bit of time trying to fix this, but have had no luck yet. I have managed to find a way to reconnect to my WiFi but not search for new connection or make a cellular connection.
This has sucked up a bunch of my time, so I haven't visited as many blogs or read as many emails as I would like. I also don't have a good blog post ready at this point. The heat, back over 90 has also sapped my energy. Other projects that I hoped to get started today have remained in the waiting stage.
So, it will be a terse blog post today and a little longer until I get around to replying to some of the emails that have piled up. Sorry. More later.
The Magic of the Midway
Submitted by Aldon Hynes on Sat, 08/07/2010 - 18:48You don’t get days much better than this for a summer carnival. The sun shone down through the nearly cloudless day without driving the temperatures up too high. My eight year old daughter had her bracelet on which allowed her unlimited rides until 5 PM. Running from one ride to the next, she would meet one set of friends and then another as they took their seats for their next adventure. Beside the rides, parents stood, waiting for the kids and holding various toys, drinks, or food for them.
The older kids who could attend the fair without their parents moved in packs whispering and giggling amongst themselves. Volunteer firemen prepared hot dogs, hamburgers and steak and cheese sandwiches. Over the heat of the grills they snapped at one another if someone took the wrong order.
Around the food tables, the politicians hovered. Congresswoman Rosa DeLauro shook hands with various constituents, and the wife and daughter of Connecticut Gubernatorial candidate Ned Lamont worked the crowd a few days before the primary.
I had had a long meeting in the morning, and was pretty tired, but I gave it my best effort. Now, I am home, resting. Fiona wants to go back at night to see all the rides lit up and perhaps more importantly, to see the fireworks. We will see if I can rally and muster the energy to drive back.
A Dream
Submitted by Aldon Hynes on Sat, 07/17/2010 - 08:14I woke up this morning from a strange dream. The earliest fragments of the dream were that I was working at some sort of financial company. The building had the feel of a cross between a large bond trading operation and library stacks. In the dream, the stock market crashed. Stocks dropped to about a third of their value, and traders mostly just sat by, stunned, and afraid to step into the market and buy anything. There was a feeling of complete financial collapse, yet it was unclear what had brought about the collapse. I spent time trying to reassure people.
Initially, I tried to reassure people who worked within the trading operation. The discussions there were mostly about how if we stick together and take care of one another, we would make it through fine. Later, I found myself speaking to elderly people, I suspect mostly clients of the trading firm. Most of them relied on the income from their retirement accounts. When I spoke with them, we found that they had moved most of their assets into government bonds which would continue to pay interest for another thirty years and they had little to worry about. Some had moved some of their assets to commodities like gold which had done very well.
Finally, I ended up at one of Fiona’s softball games. At the end of the game, the kids from both sides shook each other’s hands, the way good sportsmen typically do at their age. I commented to others about how this reflected what really mattered, the ability to work together, have fun, and enjoy life, no matter who wins or loses.
As I emerged from the dream, I noticed I had overslept and it is time for me to get ready for a weekend camping trip and a party at a friend’s house. I will leave the interpretations and associations for another time and for others to share.